Sad short stories of a girl curled up in her shell

Sometimes we just have to accept the fact that we are not a hot tumblr girl.

05.14.13 ♥ 9

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Whenever I see @kenarkind, he almost makes me feel like a normal sized person.

05.14.13 ♥ 1

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@filthy666

05.14.13 ♥ 0

I feel so fucking hopeless and depressed and miserable right now, I am in a depression chat room.

I fucking hate my life.

05.14.13 ♥ 6

I don't know how much you get asked this, and I'm sorry if you take it offensively. But what are characteristics of bpd that I could (potentially) recognize in myself? My aunt, grandma, and great grandma all have bpd... I've been ignored by shrinks for the past year or so because I'm a minor

Asked by Anonymous

I don’t take it offensively at all. I am glad that strangers feel like they can ask me questions and confide in me about it.

First off, you can’t diagnose yourself. If you think you may have it because your relatives have it, don’t assume anything until you are clinically diagnosed. No matter how much you may relate to the symptoms.

A lot of therapists may not be trained in dealing with BPD. When finding a new therapist or psychiatrist, make sure you know what they specialize in, because they’re not all the same.

BPD can be linked with depression and anxiety, and even PTSD. It is very common for adolescents to be diagnosed with those things. I am almost positive that no one will diagnose a minor with a personality disorder, though. The brain, as well as personality is still developing, so doctors tend to try and treat depression before exploring the possibility of a deeper mental illness. I was treated with depression for years until I was hospitalized and fully evaluated.

Some of the main characteristics of BPD include intense emotions, mood swings, impulsive behaviour, self-mutilation, thoughts of suicide, self-loathing, unstable relationships, and many others. It might be easy to relate to any of those, but they’re much more complicated, and I am not a doctor, and I don’t have to right nor the qualifications to diagnose anyone.

But if you believe that you might have BPD, I would suggest talking to your aunt, your grandmother, and your great grandmother. If they are seeing a licensed professional, maybe they could ask them for their advice.

Unfortunately, it’s much more difficult for a minor to get the attention they may need when it comes to mental illnesses.

05.13.13 ♥ 0

Skincare advice?

I have been trying to fix my skin lately. Alex suggested I use Dr. Bronner’s all purpose cleaner. He says I need to dry my skin out. I don’t necessarily agree with that, but I’ve been trying it for the past week or two. But it’s making my skin SO dry and it’s getting flaky and he says I shouldn’t even moisturize. So all I’ve been using is diluted soap, and Thayer’s rose petal witch hazel toner with aloe vera gel. I have also been trying to not wear makeup unless I absolutely feel it’s necessary. I am trying to clean my makeup brush regularly, as well as cleaning my phone’s screen and washing my pillowcases more.

Does anyone have any advice? I am trying to use more healthy alternatives, less chemicals, more organic ingredients. You know, good stuff.

I am curious about masks or scrubs or anything like that. I use St. Ive’s apricot scrub occasionally. I have really dry skin when I first wash it, but within an hour, it gets oily.

I am not really sure on what I should be doing to my skin. All I know is that I have lots of blemishes and red spots and I would give anything to have a clear complexion.

05.13.13 ♥ 8

Do you have any weird eating habits? Like, I'm a "texture eater"; I can't eat anything that has a weird texture like mushrooms or spinach.

Asked by Anonymous

I actually might be! I love eating crunchy things. Raw green bell peppers, chips, crackers, etc. Even when I cook things, I overcook them so they’re crispy and crunchy. I’m not sure if that counts as a weird eating habit, though.

But I do have a tendency to sort out my bites on my plate. Every different food must have an equal ratio per bite. If I take a bite of one thing, I have to take a bite of each thing on my plate before I can start chewing. And I’ll usually end up having all of my bites planned out because I carefully put together each bite until my plate is full of sectioned off already prepared bites.

Does that make sense?

05.13.13 ♥ 1

I am craving a conversation.

This is the first evening in a while I have not spent with Alex.

Who are you? Tell me about yourself. Ask me anything you’d like, and I will answer truthfully. I’m in a talkative mood.

05.13.13 ♥ 1

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05.12.13 ♥ 6

There is a building downtown that his band uses to practice. It also serves as a dance studio, a place for music lessons, as well as other creative purposes.

It was 1 in the morning, and he just finished playing a show. Him and the rest of the band were unloading their equipment into their practice space. We walked through corridors and rooms to get to their space. We walked through a mirrored dance studio, and I noticed a piano in the corner. I played while they unloaded, and it echoed through the entire building. After a while, he came and sat beside me. I sang him a song, at first it was loud and strong. Elliott Smith’s “Between the Bars”. His head was on my shoulder (he was a little drunk). I kissed his head, and began to sing quietly, as if it were only for his ears. When I was finished, he kissed me, and told me he loved me.

Drink up, baby.

05.10.13 ♥ 6

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